Εις το ονομα του… Rose

Chuck Norris facts.. fucks (γαμάνε δηλαδή)

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.
Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11…. a suicide.

Chuck Norris once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, “Bang!”

Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren’t the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.
In the Bible, Jesus turned water into wine. But then Chuck Norris turned that wine into beer.

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

Outer space exists because it’s afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch. HE decides what time it is.

If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.

The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.   

Chuck Norris invented Kentucky Fried Chicken’s famous secret recipe, with eleven herbs and spices. But nobody ever mentions the twelfth ingredient: Fear.

Chuck Norris doesn’t shower, he only takes blood baths.

Chuck Norris was the fourth wise man, who gave baby Jesus the gift of beard, which he carried with him until he died.

Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.
  
When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn’t get wet. Water gets Chuck Norris.
  
Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.

Chuck Norris and Mr. T walked into a bar. The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.

Chuck Norris once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.

Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer

Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.

Filed by rose at Ιανουάριος 12th, 2010 under Uncategorized